» FWD: Is This the Year You Adopt?

[This article was originally written by an old friend, Tricia Hopper Butts…..It’s used here with her permission. Tricia and her family currently live in Mobile, AL and blogs at calebandtricia.blogspot.com and bettydonnephoto.com]

A few years ago, my wonderful friend Amanda shared that instead of New Years Resolutions, she does a one word to theme out her year….. Joy or Thankful or Patience…. you get the idea.

I decided to copy her last year and as I’ve written before, my word was Contentment.

While I’m still mulling over my 2016 Word, I started thinking, what if everyone who says “I’ve always thought about adoption” made it their Word.

As in, maybe this is the year your family should quit thinking about adoption/foster care and start talking about it.

About 2-3 times a month, I receive a message from a friend of a friend of a friend who wants to talk with me about the adoption process. Every single message begins the same way: I’ve always thought about adoption, but I don’t know where to start. We’ve totally been there too and know just how you feel. It’s completely overwhelming.

So if you decide that 2016 is the year that you start talking about what adoption might look like for your family, here are some talking points that might help you navigate the discussion. This isn’t an all-inclusive list, just some ideas for you and your spouse to consider.

Domestic or International

Are you more drawn to adopting locally or nationally?
Is there a particular country that you lean toward? Ethiopia, China, Guatemala, etc.

Can you handle the huge cultural transition it would be for the child?


Realistically, do you see yourself adding a child of a different skin color to your family?

Are you apprehensive about the issues that could arise for you and the child by being a multi-racial family?


Do you definitely only want a baby or would you consider a toddler, young child, or even a teenager?

How would age affect your biological children, specifically if birth order was changed?

Special Needs

Would you consider adopting a physically, mentally, emotionally, or developmentally delayed child?

Your Finances

Where is the money going to come from?
Are you ok with asking friends and family for donations or what are areas of your budget could you cut back on to help with costs? Pray separately for about a week about each of those issues before talking together. That prayer time allows for the Lord to soften or change your hearts and can direct you guys more closely to being on the same page.Because once y’all are on the same page, it will be easier to know where to start.And above all else, remember that the Lord is in control of your adoption situation, so every challenge you come across or door that shuts is really just Him leading you in another direction- a direction closer to the child He has planned for you.

(Ella is in this pic, we just didn’t know it yet!)

About the author


Erica is an advocate for simplicity, family time, making a cozy home and loving others well. She is the community coordinator for One Orphan, the orphan care ministry of America World Adoption Association. Erica and Calvin have four young children; Elliott, Charlotte, Lola and Liam. They currently reside in Nashville, TN.

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