A series of interesting events led us on a bit of a detour/adventure this past year. We had high hopes that didn’t pan out. But God’s plans really are better than high hopes. In fact they are a heck of a lot more solid than hopes. Any discomfort or displacement we may have felt during this time, and now, are for the good He is continuing to orchestrate. I say this with confidence, but if you have talked to me lately you might question that resolve. I haven’t cried this much since I was pregnant. Whew.
Home is so important to me. Building and curating a place of welcome. Stocking a fridge with things that aid hospitality. Yet I’ve been dreaming about a downsize and in our culture less room seems to spell less room for people. This year when everything shifted and left us scrambling to sell our home of ten months and buy another, in an extremely crazy market, we were forced to downsize. Sure we could have extended a bit, added a bit more to the payment, compromised on our budget. But all the signs pointed toward actually doing what we’ve felt led to do for years: downsize and create room for others nonetheless. And so, we did it. We bought a house that was considerably smaller but checked many boxes for our family of six. It needs work and it apparently has a history of heartbreak. It has stretched me… it has made me uncomfortable. Mostly because the A/C unit promptly went out when we moved in. (Please kick in home warranty!) It’s embarrassing to admit all these first world thoughts and problems. But our struggles, no matter how frivolous are sharable. Perhaps for you, but perhaps for me as well. Sharing puts my heart on display in a way that helps me examine it for what really lies inside, it helps me throw out the clutter and refine what needs to belong.
As I moved into this house my friend and co-laborer (because she doesn’t just live in this world, she’s works in it) handed me a beautiful emerald book that said so many things that I want my heart to feel and accomplish consistently. In The Gospel Comes with a House Key Rosaria Butterfield states that hospitality is not just moral posturing. Hospitality is loving your neighbor at every opportunity and at every cost.
Whoa. Holy cow.
In my tears, the loss of space, and dirtiness of current space and disfunctionality of space… all things that will be fixed… were directly associated with my desire to be hospitable and open with my home. But if hospitality is loving your neighbor, that has little to do with what your home looks or feels like.
The second is this: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.
There is no other commandment greater than these. Mark 12:31
The list of DIYs is long. And yes, I still want to curate a beautiful place to sit with others through whatever joy or trial they are facing. I want to create a space that my children come home to and bring others with them. But above all I want to do what God requests of me. Create in me a pure heart Lord, one that loves my neighbor well and opens my table to a stranger. If my home can be a peaceful resting place along the way, then so be it. I hope you’ll come along for the ride as we work on this space, and our mission, as a family.